From Iceland — Sour Grapes

Sour Grapes

Published October 6, 2007

Sour Grapes

Iceland, American Citizen leaves homeland until Bush leaves office Has passport but no place to live
Auctioning himself to international bidders of the world You might think I’m crazy, but I’ve decided to leave America until George Bush leaves the Whitehouse. I’m so desperate to get away from George W. that I’m selling myself on eBay to the highest bidder. It’s my way of sticking it to the administration and speaking out for a way of life which many Americans still hold dear. I prefer a country with healthcare, clean air and drinkable water. A country where “Evolution,” “Liberal,” and “Kyoto,” aren’t dirty words. A country where free speech isn’t viewed as unpatriotic dissention by the status quo. I demand to have a President that leads and makes decisions without first consulting the Bible and his personal version of Jesus Christ.
To the bidders of the world:
What you are bidding on is the right to have and house your very own 30-year old American dissident for the period of one month. I plan on asking the world to give my homeland another chance as we both turn the page on this failed administration. With any luck I’ll become a traveling disaster for the current administration. If I can somehow draw their warmonger attention and distract them, we can save the world a lot of pain. I don’t think Bush will invade your country for housing me, but you never know. He may classify me as a WMD, bypass the United Nations, destroy everything, surge, and then leave while patting himself on the back.
Good luck bidding,
Citizen X
Dear Citizen X,
Will you clean, cook, and take part in general household chores during your stay? If so, I would be more than happy to spend a small amount of money to bring you over. I would even apply for a permanent resident pass for you. Think bigger, forget about Bush, man, lets work out some kind of deal where you do all my dirty work, in the name of world piece.
I recently visited Iceland (which I like immensely) and picked up a copy of The Reykjavik Grapevine.
Just to say that, as a visitor, I liked it very much. It manages to balance the fine line between something that is informative but readable at the same time.
Thanks for a good experience J.
Frank Tompson
Dear Frank,
Good to hear that you liked our city, even better that you liked our publication. You are obviously a man of considerable intelligence.
Hello,dear Sir/Madam:
I would like to know about: education, marriage ,child care, baby culture in iceland, costume cultures, folklores and other related thidngs to the people of far-fetched and perhaps neat and health-giving Iceland. Moreover i am eager to find girl friends from iceland. if you could help me to write me back about some sites or people who would like to make friend and maybe have a travel here in my country and stay for a while do not hesitate to do so as a great favour to me. thanks a lot for your assistance and attention.
yours Hussein Haji
Dear Hussein Haji,
Try reading the Grapevine. Search the back issues and you wil find all the info you need on costume cultures and baby cultures, and what ever other cultures fit your needs. Heck, there is even an interview with a folklorist in this issue. I hope this was of some help to you and good luck finding an Icelandic girlfriend. I recommend you try the websites and

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