Sour grapes and stuff - The Reykjavik Grapevine

Sour grapes and stuff

Sour grapes and stuff

Published September 1, 2009

Sour grape of the month
A case of POLAR BEER for your thoughts.
We’re not gonna lie to you: we really love us some beers. Some folks
would call it a problem, but beer never gave us any problems. In fact,
over the years, it’s solved most of ’em. A frosty glass of cold,
frothy, bubblicious, golden-tinted beer has consistently failed to let
us down.
In the immortal words of Homer J. Simpson: “Mmm… Beer…”
Now, since we’re real pleasant and giving folks here at the Grapevine,
we thought we’d share some of that wonderful POLAR BEER with you, our
readers. Henceforth, until the end of days (or our Polar
Beer-sponsorship program, whichever comes first), we will reward one
MOST EXCELLENT LETTER with a case of the Polar Beer. You read right. A
full case of beer. At your disposal.
Give us your worst: letters@grapevine.is
MOST AWESOME LETTER:
Iceland as a front in the war on human existance
Dear editor,
Feel free to publish this letter in your magazine. It is written mainly
to follow the initiative of the “In Defence Group” that encouraged
people to explain the Icelandic point of view, when it comes to the
diplomatic clash with the countries of EU in the wake of the banking
collapse. I have been trying to get my articles published in a series
of papers now, but sadly few of them benefit from the truth getting out
about the attacks on Iceland.
I have been warning the Icelandic government and the media for the last
couple of years now that a fierce attack on Icelandic sovereignty has
already been launched and war has been going on for a while now. This
attack, now in the height of it´s devestation, has been carefully
plotted for years now and is a significant part of an elaborate scheme
to bring Icelanders to their knees.
Why Iceland? Why are the English and Dutch suddenly so hostile towards
Iceland and why do they insist Icelanders surrender to slavery because
of Icesave? I will tell you, and although it might sound surreal and
even a bit crazy, I insist that you open your eyes to the conspiracy
that is taking place right here, right now, but has been going on for
thousands of years. The conspiracy of the Beast against mankind.
Whales are highly intelligent creatures with an ability to communicate
that even surpasses our own. What is more, they effectively practice
mindcontrol on lesser human subjects. I have countless proofs of this,
none though as blatantly obvious as the one embodied in the traitor
Captain Watson of Sea Shepherd, who under the spell of whales has been
tireless in terrorizing his own kin for decades now, to the benefit of
whales.
Although we do not with the tools we now possess, fully understand how,
we can clearly see that whales actively practice mind control, so when
it comes to lobbying and political maneuvering, no beast is more
capable than the whale.
The Icelandic foreign ministry offers no resistance. Not surprisingly
so, as the ministries strongest asset has long been the ability to
throw  good cocktail parties for International bankers, much rather
than mobilizing to secure Icelands image and interrests around the
world.
So the whales have had an easy task on that front. They have with the
aid of Green Peace and other similar terrorist groups, manipulated the
world media, the international finance sector and the rest of the
international institutes to work against us in the war on whales.
The Dutch and the English are simply acting on behalf of the Beast,
just like they did when Iceland started fighting back to break the
siege of whales in the summer of 2006. Embassadors were summoned and
the governments of these two countries made their alliegences clear.
They were teaming up with the whales in their battle against Iceland.
Iceland is fighting on more fronts though. Polarbears invaded last
summer. As they are the largest of all land predators on earth and more
dangerous than most, we must be concidered lucky that we suffered no
casualties. Thanks to the heroic effort of Icelandic policeforce the
monsters were slain.
But that did not stop them from carrying out their mission, as the
incident caused public outrage. The police was in fact heavily
critisized for offering the last line of defence for our country. As
obvious as it might now seem, the polarbears were sent here for
presicely that purpose. A suicide mission to divide our ranks as well
as rallying traitors to their cause.
Is it a coincidence that only months prior to the attack, ALL major
international media were bombarding people with cute childhood photos
of Knut the white spawn of Berlin, the latest successor to the throne
of Hell. Appearing on covers of more than a 10.000 newspaper and
magazines worldwide in a matter of days, he became the most famous
german since…
All of a sudden, the world was in love with polar bears. The masses
became bewitched by Knuts shiny fur and innocent appearance and surely
enough, hostility towards Icelanders grew to new heights as reports
emerged that we were slaughtering polarbears for sport. The Beast had
won another perfectly executed PR-battle, and Knut the White Demon of
Ba´al Moloch, grew stronger and more influencial than ever before,
sitting on his throne in Berlin, the heart of United Europe.
I hope we will be able to turn the tables in this fight but the enemy
is formiddable. We cannot expect to win if people don´t know the enemy.
Those who want to get more information on the conspiracy, get more
articles and study the history of the Beast going back to the dawn of
man, can send questions and comments to ConspiracyoftheBeast@gmail.com.
Regards,
Dr. Berthold Manz
Co-Founder of the Albrecht foundation against Animal influence in the EU.
Dear Dr. Berthold,
Holy fucking shit. This is unnerving information. Hope the free beer
helps you drown out your worries. Since THE BEAST is taking over and
all, we might as well party down during our last days of freedom,
right? Hope you don’t mind it’s POLAR BEER you’ll be using for the last
skáls.
Also, have you seen Zeitgeist and Zeitgeist Addendum? Or Nine Eleven
Loose Change? Do these beasts have anything to do with those
conspiracies, ya think?

Hi,
Just a comment on Sari Peltonen’s review of Íslenski Barinn, in the current  issue.  El Grillo is named after the wreck in seyðisfjörður, but it sure isn’t  brewed there.  Before it was sold, sure, but ever since it’s public release it’s been brewed by none other than Ölgerðin, right here in reykjavik.  I’m sure they’re very happy having you think it’s a from a nice arty town out east though 🙂
Still, glad to read about beer reviews in a restaraunt review 🙂
Cheers,
Karl P
Dear Karl,
Thank you for clearing that up. Gosh, I hope that was the *only* mistake we made in our last issue.

Hello,
at the very beggining thank you for your paper- it was really fine thing to read it before our trip to Island , during it and now, when we’re back home. Really great, great job!
Anyway, I just wanted to ask you if it is possible to get a dvd release or anything else, of the dreamland documentary. I read the interview with the director in May’s edition of grapevine, managed to get the book and now very eager to see the movie. On the internet I could only watch the trailers.
My friends are going to spend their holidays in Iceland and I wondered- maybe you could tell me if it is possible(and if yes- where) to get the movie somewhere in Reykjavik.
Thank you in advance and all the best from Poland:)
Regards,
Ania
p.s.Didn’t want to mention it at all, cause it sounds like a cliche, but can’t help to write that Iceland rules!! Definitely the most beautiful nad amazing place I have ever been to.
Dear Ania,
Thank you for your letter and for your kind words about the paper. Lord knows we try our best. You know. A lot of folks stay up all night making this thing,, so it’s good that some of y’all appreciate it.
Anyway. We checked with the Dreamland folks, and they tell me the film won’t be out on DVD for a while to come. So sorry about that, I guess, but once its out, you can surely order it from somewhere on the Internet. That place has lots of stuff going for it.
Also, I had the good fortune of sitting in a bus that rode through Poland in February. I missed my flight from Berlin and had to catch one from Warsaw. I had to get to Warsaw via some budget bus. It was actually a pretty shitty experience all in all, the bus was cold and it rained in there for some reason, and I had to spend a lot of money to get back to Reykjavík. Still, I was pretty happy to have ridden through Poland, the folks I met there were extraordinarily nice, and I got a real good kebab at some rest stop. And what I saw of it looked real cool. I plan on going back.


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