Stuck in a tricky situation? Don’t worry, Grapevine’s advice column is here to help you.
How do I deal with the fact that summer’s over when it never really started?
Write some sad music and get famous. It’s a tried-and-true method for many Icelandic artists.
What’s the appropriate amount of time to know someone before moving in with them?
This answer varies wildly based on your sexuality. For straights, it’s usually after a year. If you’re a lesbian though, it’s customary to show up to the second date with your cat carrier in hand, ready to get engaged to someone who you will later break up with and then introduce to your subsequent girlfriend during a future game night. Ex-vetting is very real.
Why is black metal never played on the radio?
What do you do when your friend is depressed or having suicidal thoughts?
Helping a friend who is suffering with mental health issues is difficult, because the old adage, “You cannot help someone that doesn’t want help,” is very true. It’s common for those suffering from depression or suicidal thoughts to isolate themselves and push those close to them away, which can be disheartening to those that care about them.
The best thing you can do is to encourage them—strongly, but delicately—to get help. Also, be there as a friend, even if they are not responsive. Text them memes, bring them food, just show up to watch a movie. Listen to them and validate their emotions, even if you don’t understand them. Sentences like “That sounds really difficult,” or “You are not weak,” make a big difference.
More importantly, if someone is having suicidal thoughts, they already know how much it will upset their friends and family if they die. Be there to support them but don’t guilt them. That said, if things get very bad and you worry for their safety, call the police or the Red Cross helpline (1717) if you are in Iceland.
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