Words by

Valur Grettisson

How do you get rid of bad luck from moving a rock on the black beaches? Asking for a friend 😉

Well, first of all, was it an elfstone? If so, buddy, you are fucked. We can’t really do anything for your “friend” other then call the funeral home and order the casket. But if it was just a random stone on the beach, no one gives a shit.

Here’s my questions please. 1. If I want to live in Iceland should I learn their language? 2. Is it easy to get married to an Icelandic girl and start a new life there? 3. How about jobs? Is it easy to find?! Thank you, and God bless you.

1. Sure, if you want to be part of Icelandic society, learn the language. 2. I don’t know. Are you handsome and/or charming and not afraid of strong independent women? Then you have a chance. If you oppose feminism and a woman’s right to choose, then evolve, you pathetic cavemen. The answer to the rest is basically: If you’re in the EU, it’s easy, if not, you’re fucked. Thank you, and may Óðinn smite you.

Do Icelandic folks really use an app that identifies potential relatives and protects them from accidental incest? If so, what are the social protocols around asking a new acquaintance to “bump” phones with you?

The answer is no. It’s fake news. Hooking up with your relatives is an American thing. The Brits also do this— it’s actually legal to marry your first cousin over there. And, of course, America was an English colony for over a hundred years. So that’s probably where they picked up that nonsense.