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Give’Em The Old Razzle Dazzle
And a 5, 6, 7, 8… will you hit your mark or fall flat? The curtain rises. The stage is set. Adler, Fosse, Sondheim, they roll in their graves. I don’t see this production going smoothly. Musical fans are rabid, not even…
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Horrortropes: Wild West Woes
Slap some bacon on a biscuit and let’s go! We’re burnin’ daylight! WOOOoooOOOooOOOOO. Waaaa waaa waaaaaa. Welcome to Reykjavik, the most rootin’ tootin’ town this side’o the Westfjords. So saddle up, we’re seein’ what lies on the tracks. Spoiler alert, its Pisces.…
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Horrortropes: The End is Noir
Horoscopes can’t be all bad, but these come the closest Case-4-24, it’s been sitting on your desk for a while. You take a slow drag from a cheap cigarette and wipe some stray ash from the dossier. Time to crack this bad…
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Horrortropes: Fantastical Fortunes
Don’t fear your fortune (or do, it’s up to you) The Dark Lord Skuggamyrkur’s armies are beating down the forces of light. We are on the brink of collapse. In our moment of desperation, we turn to the Oracle of the Sun.…
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Horror-Scopes: Oh, Snap! Marvelous Zodiac Pairings
What tells you more about a person: their Zodiac sign or which Avenger they most identify with? It’s always better to be overinformed, so Grapevine got busy pairing the star signs with characters from the Marvel Cinematic Universe. So…before we get started,…
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Horror-Scopes: We Get It, Scorpio You Love Halloween
In Horror-Scopes, the Grapevine’s dedicated team of amateur astrologists give you their mystical insights on how to live a long and fulfilling life. Think of us as psychic grandmas. We love you. Aries Your TikTok game is perfect, but maybe wait til you…
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Horror-Scopes: The Fault In Your Stars
In Horror-Scopes, Grapevine’s dedicated team of professional astrologists breaks down your upcoming weeks based on shit like where the planet Venus was at the rough moment you were born. Aries Beware: If you don’t show up for the Pride Parade, you will…
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Grapevine’s Political Horoscope
We at Grapevine pride ourselves on being on the cutting edge of analysis and the scientific method. In keeping with this, we offer for you this definitive political horoscope to help you navigate your way through the political landscape. What should you…