Words by

Nanna Árnadóttir

@nannaarnadottir

Photo by

RMM

Dear Nanna,

I’m heading to Iceland soon and am looking forward to checking out the “swimming pool” culture. Any do’s and don’ts I should be aware of?

Fish In The Water

Dear Fish In The Water,

Actually yes, a visit to an Icelandic swimming pool is a complex social ritual with three basic tenets.

Dear Nanna,

I’m visiting Iceland for the first time this year! (YAY!)
So I’m wondering, what’s the general opinion men there have of latinas? Is it true most Icelandic men are huge athletic-crazed monster mountain types?…and what the hell is this I’m hearing about communal nudity?

Ciao Bella,

R

Dear R

First of all, who cares about the opinion of privileged white Icelandic guys? If they don’t bow before your magnificence and worship at the altar of your Kween-like majesty they deserve to be sold into serfdom and suffer the consequences of their hubris.

Secondly, I’ve seen like three mountain guys in Iceland, ever. We have three of them and the rest are doughy but lovable IT workers with creative hobbies.

Thirdly, communal nudity is only really relevant at the swimming pool. For knowledge on how to go to the pool, see my video above.

Dear Nanna, 

What’s the deal with not being able to blow your nose in public? My nose is running but if I dare blow it Icelanders give me stink eye! 

Achoo!

Red Nose

Dear Red Nose,

It’s called an unspoken rule and I don’t make the rules, so keep your snotty snot to yourself you disgusting wretch! Where do you think you are? The continent? Go blow your nose at home, sicko!

Nanna

Got a question for me about Iceland or need some bad life advice? Use the hashtag #DontAskNanna, tweet me on @NannaArnadottir or email nanna.arnadottir(at)gmail.com and you might get an answer next Friday or not, whatever, I’m pretty busy eating pizza and massaging my cat’s butt.