Whelp, kelp, help, skelp, Phelp, yelp, welp, chelp, sngelp. These are all words that rhyme, yet only one is a service I offer.
Seeking advice about the future? Problems with lovers? Just have something you need to get off your chest? Call Charlie!
Tara asks: What is networking like in Reykjavík? Is there an app that takes the place of MeetUp? What’s a good way to make new friends based on similar interests?
Networking in Reykjavik is ridiculously easy because this island has a population of approximately twenty people. If you have any hobbies or interests there will be around three to four people with the exact same interest and GOOD NEWS! They’re already friends! So, you only need to meet just one, and then you’ll meet the rest. I don’t know what this MeetUp app is, but you can absolutely try the Íslendingabók genealogical website if you’re running out of options.
Helgi asks: How can we peacefully eradicate fascism with reasoned debate and good-faith arguments, when fascists have no qualms with using violence, polemic rhetoric and bad-faith arguments? Yes, this is a rhetorical question
Fascism is a difficult subject to approach as even careful mention of it has the power to give it momentum. And as you point out, reasoned debate and good-faith arguments often fall short. So, the best advice I can give is from Judith Butler’s Who’s Afraid of Gender:
“…rather, [by] releasing radical democratic potentials from our own expanding alliances can show we are on the side of livable life, love in all its difficulties, and freedom, making those ideals so compelling that no one can look away, making desire desirable again in such a way that people want to live, and want others to live in the world we imagine…” (264).
Lynne asks: What do Icelandanders really feel about tourists? Are we a nuisance? Is there cultural norms that you wish we would observe? (I tried to engage in conversation with staff at 2 grocery stores and it seemed to annoy them. Sorry!)
Tourists are often seen as an invasive species. Though distinct in their evolutionary past from local flora and fauna, Icelanders have been able to successfully harvest krona from these strange siphonophores by offering fridge magnets and the like. But you, Lynne, you specifically have grown to be a problem. Not only did you call the locals Icelandanders but you’ve engaged in small talk with not one but TWO people. We’re going to have to put you down Lynne, I’m sorry.
Chuck says while referring to a thief caught at Bonus: Given his criminal history, he’s probably a serial thief. In this case, was he an actual cereal thief?
Listen here Chuck, I don’t sit on my ass doing NOTHING seven days a week, churning out “Help? Call Charlie!” articles for you to come in here and be funnier than me! This is how I bring home my fucking bacon, AND I WILL NOT BE REPLACED BY SOME HALF-WIT COMEDIAN ON FACEBOOK WITH A PENCHANT FOR PUNS. DO YOU HEAR ME! I WILL NOT-
Hi, Grapevine Editor here. Charlie started foaming at the mouth in the office and animal control had to cart him away again. But don’t worry, he’ll be back soon enough. If you have any questions you’re dying to ask, send them over to our Facebook or Instagram page and Charlie will get back to them soon enough.
Bless bless
The Editor
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