-
Iceland Smites: The Boys Are Back In Town
The horns are sounding. The drums are beating. The boats are mooring. Our boys are back in town for the international break, ready for the fight of their lives. Here’s how they’ve been preparing, with some key smiters in much better shape…
-
#IcelandSmites: Qatar Bows, Tyrants Froth, Óðinn Rages & More
After millenia of scorching heat, a biting cold has engulfed Qatar. Aron Gunnarsson’s relentless typhoon of destruction has the nation quaking in its boots, with scores of the population declaring their allegiance to Al Arabi just to avoid his wrath. But in…
-
#IcelandSmites: Our boys unleash footballing Eyjafjallajökull
Oh yes. It’s the time of year when the Icelandic diaspora converges on the motherland and erupts like Eyjafjallajökull all over its opposition. In recent days, senior smiters and snow leopard cubs alike have taken the Euro qualifiers by storm, sweeping aside…
-
#IcelandSmites: The Return of the King
In a world first, Qatar’s domestic league took precedence over the English Premier League thanks to one man. Iceland’s lionheart, Aron Gunnarsson, returned to the frontline at long last, while his supporting battle captains, as ever, did not go quietly into that…
-
#IcelandSmites: Let The Battle (Re)commence
And then there were two. The Premier League is one Viking general light after Aron Gunnarsson’s departure to Qatar, leaving Everton’s Gylfi Sigurðsson and Burnley’s Jóhann Berg Guðmundsson bearing the burden of English omni-obliteration in 2019/20. Needless to say, they are hungrier…
-
#IcelandSmites: Let The Battle (Re)Commence
And then there were two. The Premier League is one Viking general light after Aron Gunnarsson’s departure to Qatar, leaving Everton’s Gylfi Sigurðsson and Burnley’s Jóhann Berg Guðmundsson bearing the burden of English omni-obliteration in 2019/20. Needless to say, they are hungrier…
-
Icelandic Football News: Sexy Rúrik Smashes In A Hattrick!
With just a few weeks remaining until the start of the 2019-20 season, the smiters have returned to their clubs to sharpen their axes, make their blood offerings and cast their hexes for the campaign ahead. Here’s the latest Icelandic football news,…
-
#IcelandSmites: The 2018/19 Premier League Review
All of England breathed a sigh of relief on May 12th as the all-conquering Norse pillagers of Everton, Burnley and Cardiff finally took their leave of the English Premier League—some more permanently than others. With the season over and the smiting ceased,…
-
#IcelandSmites: Iceland On Track To Win Euro 2020
As the European 2019-20 season heads to its climax, Iceland’s quest to be crowned the best Viking football horde in Europe looms ever closer. The Euro 2020 qualifiers are coming and, like the White Walkers marching into Westeros, we’re ready. Euro trophy…
-
Smitey Smitemas: A Mid-Season Check-In With Our Vikings-At-Large
The Christmas period is a crazy time in football. With matches coming thick and fast—particularly in the English Premier League, where every team plays four matches between December 21st and January 3rd—this period can be decisive in how the league will take…
-
#IcelandSmites: Horde In Hamrén-induced Hypersleep; Glory Abounds Anyway
After the end of their injury-smited, ignominious UEFA Nation’s League campaign, the horde has dispersed back to their day jobs, once more smiting all and sundry in the top-tier contests across Europe. Here’s a rundown of the latest news from Camp Smite.…
-
#IcelandSmites: Gylfi’s Golden 50, Finnbó On Fire, France Frenzy, Nations Knockout
The Icelandic team has recently been going through a bit of an “Empire Strikes Back” period, with countless injuries and the loss of a wise elder statesman leading to some dodgy results. October, however, felt ripe for the comeback. Will our heroes…
-
Steve Bruce’s Crack Pipe And Hodgson’s Hex: Iceland’s Footballing Vikings
As The Icelandic team rests before going once more into the fray against Switzerland on October 15th in the UEFA Nations League, the horde dispersed to pillage and plunder at club level. Here’s an update on how Iceland’s footballing heroes have been…
-
A Smite By Any Other Name: Women’s Team Crashes Out Of World Cup Contention
As the Icelandic Valkyries’ World Cup hopes are shipwrecked, a new era begins for the men under Swedish coach Erik Hamrén. Here’s the latest news from the battlecamp. Icelandic women’s team smited by Germany Our national women’s football team roared into battle…
-
The Smiters Reawaken: Our Girls To Shatter German Psyche, “Horror Hooves” Provokes Limb Frenzy & More
The football – and thereby the smiting – is returning to European shores, but the times they are a-changin’. Coach Heimir has left his post, Aron “The Annihilator” Gunnarsson is playing Premier League football for the first time in four years and…
-
The Smiting Never Ends: Women’s World Cup, Aron & Hannes Contracts & More
After a fascinating World Cup tournament reached its finale, the Icelandic men’s team are regrouping for some coming tournaments, while the women’s team storms past a much-fancied Germany side to potentially top their group for the Women’s World Cup. Here’s all the…
-
#SmiteTheWorld: A Recap Of Iceland’s World Cup Adventure
And that, as they say, is that. Iceland’s World Cup run was short, but glorious. Their incident-packed week in the Group of Death—Argentina, Croatia, Nigeria, and of course, Iceland—gripped the entire nation, and, for that matter, the world. We ran a daily…
-
Iceland 1 – 2 Croatia: Full Report, Player Ratings, Man of the Match
Alas, Iceland’s beautiful adventure ends in glorious defeat. Earlier today at the Rostov Arena, our boys battled until the bitter end but were unable to get the win they needed, losing 2-1 to the old enemy Croatia. They dominated the game for…
-
#SmiteTheWorld Daily: Heimir’s Future, Opta Slam Our Chances, God On Our Side, & More
While Aron was banging the drum outside Croatia’s team hotel so they couldn’t nod off last night, the whole Icelandic nation was struggling to sleep for other reasons. Today is D-Dayfor Iceland’s World Cup campaign, and as tough as our boys’ path…
-
Smite Preview: Iceland Vs Croatia Tactics, Team News, Lineups & More
The Rostov boys Björn Bergmann Sigurðarson, Sverrir Ingi Ingason and Ragnar Sigurðsson have booby-trapped the pitch. Gylfi has been practising penalties night and day. Alfreð Finnbogason is primed to poach, Aron Gunnarsson is ready to annihilate and Ólafur Ingi Skúlason has been…
-
#SmiteTheWorld Daily: Gylfi Still Positive, Alfreð Still Hungry, Rúrik Still Sexy, & More
It’s two days until the fight for Iceland’s World Cup life. The players have been sending out good vibes and social media posts, and having press conferences ahead of the Croatia clash. Here’s what’s being said in Camp Smite. 3 more days..…
-
#SmiteTheWorld Daily: Mouthy Modrić, Mikel Shits Brick, Rúrik’s Instamillion & More
After the horde let Nigeria off the hook in Stalingrad, it’s Croatia’s turn to enter the smiting line as we aim for a fast-narrowing window into the last sixteen. Destiny is calling: here’s what’s happening in Camp Smite. Modrić: "I wish Argentina…
-
Nigeria 2-0 Iceland: Full Report, Player Ratings, Man of the Match
Just as they did in Euro 2016, our boys have ensured that maximum Gummi Ben-levels of euphoria will be reached in the final group game against Croatia, intentionally losing against Nigeria today for the sole purpose of tension-building. Icelanders, after all, don’t…
