meet the smiters
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Meet The Smiters: Guardians Of The Bench
Football is war. So if one of Iceland’s perfect eleven should accidentally lose a leg or a head (other than Aron Einar, who would play on regardless), we might need some young reinforcements to send into the fray. Introducing: the stripling warlords…
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Meet The Smiters: Ari Freyr “The Unforgiven” Skúlason
What Ari Freyr Skúlason lacks in height, he makes up for in sheer, unadulterated psychopathy. In fact, Ari’s capacity for empathy is so impaired that he has been ordered by every club he has ever played for to train barefoot as a…
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Meet The Smiters: Samúel Kári “The Hammer” Friðjónsson
“Friðjónsson can hit them from here,” Guy Mowbray will say, preemptively, as Sammi lines up a 35-yard piledriver against the Croats on June 26th at the Rostov arena, his eyes fixated on the valve of the Telstar ball as the stadium inhales…
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Meet The Smiters: Ólafur Ingi “The Shaman” Skúlason
When Ólafur Ingi Skúlason was a child, his father would tell him a story about the humble people of Vestmannaeyjar. “Long, long ago,” he would begin, as he perched on the edge of young Ólafur’s bed, “some of the islanders were skimming…
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Meet The Smiters: Jóhann Berg “The Berginator” Guðmundsson
It is written that in the year of 1990, a strange iceberg drifted into Reykjavík’s smoky bay and washed ashore on the uninhabited Geldinganes headland. A curious shepherd wandered out for a look and was shocked to find a baby amongst the…
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Meet The Smiters: Alfreð “Arctic Fox In The Box” Finnbogason
Alfreð Finnbogason is strákarnir okkar’s “Arctic Fox in the Box,” whose cunning spearheads Heimir Hallgrímsson’s side. Alfreð is always lurking in the danger zone, and pounced three times in eight qualification games, a scoring record only bested by talisman Gylfi Sigurðsson. Feared…
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Meet The Smiters: Emil “The Emilinator” Hallfreðsson
Part-man, part-glacier, Emil “The Emilinator” Hallfreðsson is so strong that Hafþór Júlíus “The Mountain” Björnsson addresses him as “Master.” This belittling term of endearment owes to a childhood encounter at a summer football camp in Reykjavík, when Emil body-slammed Hafþór to the…
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Meet The Smiters: Birkir Már “The Steriliser” Sævarsson
Birkir Már Sævarsson is ever-present in Berserkirnir Okkar’s rearguard. He’s a fully certified bore-draw fanatic, as spindly as he is ravenous for keeping clean sheets. Birkir Már spends his free time re-watching Greece’s excruciatingly dull road to the Euro 2004 title, pondering…
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Meet The Smiters: Birkir “Horror Hooves” Bjarnason
Much like Freyfaxi—the galloping stallion of Hrafnkels Saga—Birkir Bjarnason is a glorious creature to be admired—but not insulted by the touch of mere mortals. Indeed, it is rumoured that Bjarki is so genetically perfect that his face and hair are insured for…
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Meet The Smiters: Jón Daði “The Scythe of Selfoss” Böðvarsson
Jón Daði “The Scythe of Selfoss” Böðvarsson is so big that his hometown considers him a landmark as well as a citizen. Born in 1992, Jón Daði was 5“11 by the age of eight and was deemed to be so imposing that…
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Meet The Smiters: Kári “The Disciple of Doom” Árnason
Born in Gothenburg, Sweden and raised in Reykjavík, Kári “The Disciple of Doom” Árnason has been canonised on terraces in seven different countries. His dogged determination, penchant for the spectacular, and icy wit have endeared him to fans, but in reality, there’s…
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Meet the Smiters: Ragnar “Shaggy Breeches” Sigurðsson
Ragnar Sigurðsson is a burly blockade at the rear-end of strákarnir okkar (“our boys”), and a fierce defender of national pride. As a living reincarnation of his Viking namesake, Ragnar “Loðbrók” (“Shaggy Breeches”) Sigurðsson, this modern-day Ragnar is supposedly so patriotic that…
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Meet The Smiters: Hannes Þór “Wild Claws” Halldórsson
Hannes Þór Halldórsson is more than just Iceland’s goalkeeper; he is the nation’s last line of defence and last bastion of national pride. When the enemy bears down upon his goal, he can be heard screaming “death or glory!”—a phrase that so…
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Meet The Smiters: Aron “The Annihilator” Gunnarsson
For many, Aron “The Annihilator” Einar Malmquist Gunnarsson is the face of the Icelandic national football team. A dogged, ever-committed midfielder with an end-to-end style, the team’s captain excels in crunching tackles and mighty long throws. Despite having only scored two goals…
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Meet The Smiters: Hörður Björgvin “The Beautiful Death” Magnússon
The most beautiful player on the Icelandic national team, Hörður Björgvin Magnússon, is as gifted a footballer as he is alluring and attractive. He plays in the often maligned left back position, although he can also take charge in the heart of…
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Meet The Smiters: Gylfi “The Viking Virtuoso” Sigurðsson
Gylfi Sigurðsson is the raisin at the end of the Icelandic footballing sausage. The footballing poetry produced by this “Viking Virtuoso” is enough to make Jónas Hallgrímsson proud, and often serves as inspiration for his gritty teammates. As one of Strákarnir okkar’s (“our boys”) greatest players of all time, his…