Published May 14, 2010
Contrary to what the album cover and sleeve would have you believe, Synchronised Swimmers is as straightforward and un-quirky as they come. It is pure acoustic pop, uncomplicated and simple, with not even a semblance of divergence, although some hints at depth appear towards the end (I Almost Know A Criminal, Robot Robot). I can understand the value of upbeat music, but this album is so infuriatingly brainless it’s impossible to even attach a mood to it, other than one attained by a Brady Bunch member on Prozac. It is even useless as a remedy to holiday depression, by way of overcompensation; if depression hasn’t killed you yet, this album will make you want to kill yourself through its abject, stupefying idiocy.
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