Helgi Valur, The Producer Of Confusion

If you’re not interested in bringing your dancing shoes, Helgi Valur doesn’t want to know you!

So when you think of a singer/songwriter, do you think of someone sitting all alone with pained expressions and overbearing seriousness, singing about songs of how their girlfriend left them, how lonely they are and how no one understands them? Or do you think of someone who looks to bring fun, frolics, acid wit and a bit of glamour to the proceedings, along with several of his fun filled friends as well? If you are thinking of the latter, then perhaps Mr Helgi Valur and his Shemales are just the ticket for you.

With this in mind we contacted Helgi and on love, life and how he hustles to get by.

Hi There Helgi Valur! Tell us a little bit about yourself. For example, who are you and what do you get up to in your daily lives. Remember, no detail is too small or banal…

Every day I’m hustling like Rick Ross. I ain’t got no money, so every day I work on some talent whether it is dancing, chopping vegetables, sensuality, language or different cultures. I say to myself ‘thy will, not mine, be done.’ I try to be in water, eat, dance and get hugs. I just do work that makes me happy, and if not, I’ll still be OK.

SEX AND PUSSY

What got you making music in the first place? What kept you playing?

I would have to say sex and pussy. I watched the guitar player from the band Love/Hate with his shirt off in a music video and I thought to myself this guy probably gets laid. And then I kept playing because it gave me a good avenue to get out negative or positive emotions.

We won’t have you pin yourself down in a genre, but maybe you can tell us what musicians you hope your fans also like. What music inspires you?

Prince, Jimi Hendrix, David Bowie, Joanna Newsom, Saul Williams and basically all sexy music that encompasses female magic within the male.

You surround yourself with a bevy of ‘shemales’ as your backing band. Do you think that transgendered people don’t get enough of a shout in today music scene? Will Vala Grand be making a guest appearance?

There will be dancers of different cultures that have female and male qualities. Being transgender doesn’t make you a shemale. A shemale is to me an artist who encompasses both male and female qualities. I think Vala Grand will decide if she’ll dance with me. Maybe you should ask her.

We’ll get right on that one. One of your backing band has the job description of a ‘hype womb man.’ What on earth is that?

Hype man is somebody that gets the crowd going at rap concerts, a person that builds up energy and encourages the musicians while participating. Rap is all too male so I wanted a womb man.

FUCK ROMANTIC LOVE
On your last album ‘Electric Ladyboyland,’ you sang for L-O-V-E to get away from you. Are you fearful of love, or do you just not trust its intentions?

I only trust people that love universally. Romantic love is selfish and is detrimental to the love 2Pac, John Lennon and Ginsberg talked about. So fuck romantic love.

And can you tell us what that mysterious bulge on the cover of the Album is?

My penis obviously. But contrary to popular belief it’s not erect. I think it’s glam vulnerability.

It certainly looks vulnerable. Your Airwaves bio states that you’re known as ‘the prophet formerly known as prince.’ Why did you change your name? Were people getting confused?

I am a producer of confusion. Fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke!

And what would you want to tell our readers, to convince them to come to your show (remember: the more outlandish your claim the more punters you are likely to get)?

If you’re not gonna bring your dancing shoes I don’t want you to come!

LAY LOW IS BEAUTIFUL
Don’t worry we’ll bring them. Now for all Non-Icelandic festival goers, what Icelandic acts do people needs to look out for? Are there any hidden gems in the dirt that need to be discovered?

There are a lot of gems. When I go to festivals I prepare myself and listen to bands that seem interesting. I can’t tell people what they like but I’m gonna see Lay Low because she’s beautiful.

Make a five track playlist for Festival goers to listen to while they are here in Iceland during Airwaves. Tell us why each track is there. Your scenario: You’re getting your Party face on as you’re about to head out to Airwaves on a Saturday night…

‘Pursuit Of Happiness’ – Kid Cudi (You sit down and smoke a jay and secret a good time)

Nothing Compares 2 U – Sinéad O’Connor (You hug Sinead O’Connor)

Shakira – ‘Waka Waka’ (You dance and get your energy levels up)

Prince – ‘3121’ (You get your sexy on)

The Jimi Hendrix Experience – ‘Bold As Love’ (You listen and walk into the world full of emotions in all colours of the rainbow.)

Anything else you’d like to add?

Fuck crooked police, the government, jealousy, co-dependent mothers and absent fathers. LOVE!

Helgi Valur And The Shemales will be playing on Saturday 19:30 at Tjarnabíó

Links – http://www.myspace.com/helgivalur

By Bob Cluness