Christ as a ‘Party Pervert’

Our government was brought down by old perverts last week. It has been a glorious spectacle to watch. It sounds beautifully surreal but, when you think about it, this was to be expected. After all we are a nation obsessed with both safeguarding free sexual expression and condemning perversions of old men at the same time.

What happened, in short, was that two paedophiles had their ‘Honour Restored’ by law after having served time for horrific sexual crimes against children. The government gradually tried to bury the case and nobody really understood why the ruling elite was so dedicated in its protection of convicted paedophiles of all people. But it came to light that these were no ordinary perverts. They were Party Perverts and the government had been trying to hide the fact that the father of the Prime Minister himself had written a letter recommending that one of them have his “honour restored.”

One can’t help but think we’re in an absurd Michel Houllebecq novel. a paedophile with the power to topple world governments. It’s hard to make that shit up. Yes, forget offshore accounts, relentless corruption and crony capitalism, broken promises and Ashley Madison. Nothing worked against our Teflon Prime Minister Bjarni Benediktsson until the most powerful pervert in the world took him down. For so long, so many of us had been hoping for a radical Change. A pervert capable of summoning political Armageddon was maybe not the Change we were expecting but … well, I guess we’ll take the Change we can get, regardless of form. Who knows, maybe this will change Icelandic capitalism forever? What’s next? A geopolitical paedophile? Could an unstoppable Icelandic pervert prevent a nuclear war?

In a bizarre way, it somehow feels right and natural that it took a pervert to bring down the Icelandic government. For years our perverts have been omnipresent in the media landscape as the perfect outlet for our hatred and filth. As society has gradually become more permissive in the past few decades and stopped hating various groups of people, the loathing and disgust towards perverts and paedophiles has both grown and condensed steadily. It’s probably a natural process. And now, the paedophiles, the most hated group of people of all, have somehow managed to deliver us from our notorious government, save us from ourselves almost, like some kind of ersatz Christ, alone and suspended on the cross, dripping with their own blood and other people’s spit. Could it be that this is really what they meant when they said the last will be first?