Comic Books, Rings, And Sex All Night: Countess Malaise’s Perfect Day

Countess Malaise, Reykjavík’s resident rap goth bitch, gives us the tea on her perfect day in the city.

First thing in the morning
I wake up and the sun is shining because I’m a summer child. I have a tall glass of water, make a smoothie and do some stretches. That’s the perfect way to start your day. Then, I go to the gym. I go to World Class now, but in my perfect world, Baðhúsið would still be open. I liked that place because the vibe was really cosy. I work out, sweat, go in the hot pot, chill a little bit, get a massage, and then really start my day.

Lunch
For lunch, I go to some place where I can sit outside and there’s a gluten free and vegan lunch available. All my friends are there and we spill some tea and laugh our brains out until I get a six pack.

Afternoon
Now I have a six pack from laughing and I’m feeling super sexy. I head to the studio and write and record three songs and feel accomplished. Then, I go to the Reykjavík City Library and chill in the comic book section and read all the comics I see. Afterwards, it’s off to Kolaportið, where I’d buy some rings and get blinged out. I’m feeling super shiny.

Dinner
It’s like 17:00 now and I’m blinged up with my six pack. I need some nourishment, though, so I head to Gló for the Mexican bowl. I get it takeaway so I can sit outside in the sun and tan. A friend I haven’t seen in a long time sits down with me. We chat and smoke a cigarette, but on this perfect day it’s not cancerous.

Heat of the night
At home, all my makeup brushes are clean and I have everything I need to beat my face exactly as I want it, so I burn some incense, put some nice lighting on, light a ton of candles, and beat my face up. I look super cute, tanned and still have a six pack. Then, I get a taxi to Prikið and everybody that I want to meet is there. We have a great-ass time, then I head home and take a shower to wash away the day. After that, I fuck all night.

Check out Countess Malaise‘s famous “Goth Bitch” below: